You talk too much. You’ve talked since before you ever walked — now what does that say about you? You don’t think things through. You think you do, but you don’t.
You’re getting older, but not necessarily wiser. You run rampant with your heart on your sleeve and your emotions hanging by a thread attached to… who the hell knows? Poor you because you haven’t changed. In elementary school you ran around smelling like roses and any wink from any cute boy who was taller than you made you blush and forget your name. In middle school, you became a bit of a whore. Of course, it was never anything too serious but c’mon at that age all you were suppose to be chasing was butterflies and kissing, puppies. In high school, you were always second best because you were (and are) too tall, too fat, too smart, too dumb, and yes — your doom — you talk too damn much. Talking will get you into trouble, haven’t you heard?
You hurt feelings. Now, that’s what you do, you hurt feelings. After grammar, middle, and high school, you haven’t learned to shut up. Which leads to this — stop, shut up, and go on. Forgive and forget. Watch ‘The Hills‘ if you ever forget what the meaning of that is. Someday someone will notice you — even if you talk too much.
Last night after a cold trip to the beach, $53 badly spent at Forever 21 and 2 drinks at Kyle J’s, I came home to a bowl of meatball soup. I told myself I wouldn’t eat, but I hadn’t ate in nearly 11-hours so I caved. This morning I felt disgusting, but even more disgusting was my sudden ‘reality-TV’ obsession that took hold of me at around noon. I was suppose to be writing about Patti Smith, not googling the cast of ‘Pretty Wild.’ I stopped, went back to writing.
All I’ve ate today is an orange. A delicious orange bigger than a baseball. I wonder if my mother was here and she’d cook me some food, if I would eat it, but right now I’m thinking that I wouldn’t.
You see, yesterday I got a tuberculosis-scare, well actually the scare isn’t over because the doctor couldn’t test me for TB (you’re suppose to come back to the docs after 48-hours when you get tested for TB and my doc is closed on Saturday, so I have to drag my ass there on Monday. I turn 21 on Monday). I got to thinking I have tuberculosis because A. I saw ‘Heavenly Creatures‘ recently and got completely freaked out (I am still completely freaked, I started to cry thinking I might have TB) B. I’ve been having hot flashes C. I drooled blood (I’ll leave this to your imagination) and D. I have now lost my appetite. I don’t loose my appetite, ever.
The end. There’s some stupid people outside my window thinking my apartment window belongs to the apartment next door. This isn’t the first time this happens. I feel like putting up a sign.